At Your Service.

So I thought it would be fun to offer up an actual butler for a gift guide--how cool, huh? Well, I track down this place called Starkey International out in Denver, Colorado. It's a butler school. 

Me: "Hello, Starkey butler people! So can I get some information about you and your services and what comes with a butler?"

Response from Starkey International: "At this time, we respectfully decline your invitation."

What invitation?

What ARE they talking about?

I hope that their butlers don't have such a fucked-up way of talking. I would fire their ass and pronto. Good grief!

Well, I respectfully think you should accept free press where you can especially from tasteful vehicles and outlets like me and Nixon Now.

Bitches.